We went for our weekly doctors appointment yesterday & got some news that I am still trying to process. Turns out, babies aren’t growing to my doctors liking & he is scared that if they remain in the womb, that their growth will decrease. So…babies are scheduled for delivery on Monday! Monday as in 5 days from now!!! This is only a week earlier than planned, but I am freaking out. We will be 36w3d & I am terrified that they will have to be in the NICU. It will depend on their little lungs, whether they can feed, & how much they end up weighing.
They are weighing about 4 lbs 11 oz (sonogram tech says she estimates on the high) & my doctor says that is in the 10th percentile. He doesn’t want them any lower so delivery date got bumped up! I will go on Friday to get a NST & a steroid shot to help their little lungs. If all is fine on Friday, we will head back home until Monday morning. We have to be at the hospital around 930 & delivery will be around noon. The realness hit me so hard yesterday. They are coming & I can’t wait to meet them, but at the same time I am struggling with the fact that they could spend time in the NICU.
My husband keeps reassuring me that this is the best thing for them. That they need to come out so they can grow stronger. Even if they have to go to NICU for a few days/weeks, they will be in the best hands possible. But this momma is scared. They are safe & sound in me, where I can feel their little kicks & know that they are just fine. I know that sounds completely selfish, but I find myself not ready. It is literally just 8 days earlier than my scheduled date. Why do I have so much anxiety about this? I think I need a chill pill & some chocolate right about now! We have everything ready at the house aside from sterilizing bottles. Everything is washed, put away, & my house is full on baby ready!
I have been praying all morning & asking God to help calm my nerves. To give me strength through the c-section & peace for the unknown ahead. Our boys are kicking me as I type this & it gives me comfort. God is in control & I trust my doctor 110%. Prayers are appreciated & I am so grateful for everyone’s support & love throughout our journey. Now I will go & read all the baby books that I have & get as prepared as possible! 🙂
Love you all!
XOXO- Ashlee
The Casual Me 